The Bullet-Less4: NFL Week 12

In the words of the late, great Harry Caray: "Holy Cow." It's already Thanksgiving? What? Where did the last couple of months go? It feels like just days ago I was shaking in glorious anticipation of my friends' visit for the Packers-Jets game at the Meadowlands for Halloween. Now...I sit with visions of turkey and football in my head as a lovely 3-slate game of NFL Games gave me reason to eat and sit around like the Jared of old. With that lovely vision, I give you the Bullet-Less4 NFL Update for Thanksgiving Weekend (And to keep with the theme of the blog, let's do them in reverse order of importance):

The Best Reality Show on TV, the Minnesota Vikings keep entertaining the NFL audience. After my beloved Pack put a GRADE A BEATDOWN on the Queens last Sunday, they fired their child molester-looking coach. I love to see this team battered, embarrassed, and more importantly, irrelevant. It is now safe to say that I officially have no further interest in this program and will direct all of my reality-viewing to House Hunters on HGTV (I clearly don't watch much reality TV and clearly have a girlfriend).

The Obvious Bullet-Less of Bias: The Green Bay Packers were showered in expectations before the season. Five weeks in, they were considered to be in the tank after several season-ending injuries and back-to-back OT losses to Washington and Miami. Eleven weeks in, they are 7-3 and tied for the lead in the NFC North despite the pile up on their IR list. After their last two blowout wins (resulting in the firing of two head coaches), they look strong. I have no idea what to think about their prospects going into December, but know I am in love with our defense. Yes I said our. Anything less than a playoff win would make me a sad panda.

The Contest of Insignificance is getting tighter. After praising our league leader, Steve L, a few weeks ago, he has stumbled enough to give the rest of us hope. The interesting thing is that we all seem to be performing better as a group with 66% of us with better than .500 records. As "the guy tied for 3rd place," I can only hope this goes down to the final weeks. Here are my picks for week 12, starting with one on Thanksgiving to ensure I care about at least one game:
ATL -2.5 v. GB - The Falcons are beasts at home, no question about it. I hate picking against my favorite team, but this is a gambling man's contest.
OAK -3 v. MIA - The Raiders, much to my disappointment (I have $40 on them going <6.5 wins on the season) are decent. Also, the Dolphins have a carousel at QB.
DET +7 v. NE - As I write this, I know I am wrong here because the Pats BLASTED the Lions. I thought that an under rated home team on a short week would be a good bet. Whoops.
PHI - 3 @ CHI - The Eagles have been favored by 3 the last two weeks and I have picked them the last two weeks. I'm going to keep it rolling.
SD +3 @ IND - I was REALLY close to picking DAL +3.5 instead of this game. Dallas did in fact cover, so I hope Pip Rivers doesn't make me eat my words and the Chargers can find a way to keep it close with Indy.

The Best Team in the NFL is...
Honestly, this is impossible to judge. My gut says the AFC is hosting the top teams (Pats/Steelers/Ravens/Jets), but as we have all seen, even when one conference seems dominant, they don't produce the Super Bowl champion. My only prediction at this point is that the final weeks of 2010 will not show us anything different than we have seen. Many experts say that we will see "after Thanksgiving" who the top 2-3 teams are. This year, we will go into January with 5-6 teams that can win the whole thing. Hopefully, we get the same thing next season...or just ANYTHING at all for NFL drama next season (outside of a lockout/strike). Since everyone feels the need to put their pick down on paper, here is mine at this point:
PHILLY vs. NYJ - Vick has Philly looking like a team that is impossible to stop and the Jets are going to be tough to beat with their running game in the cold. Jets 27 - Philly 24.



Buckle up for a great finish to the NFL Season, the Contest of Insignificance, and the end of 2010. As for now, buckle up with friends and family and Happy Turkey to everyone...IN YO' MOUTHS!

The Contest of Insignificance: Week 9

In my last post on the joys of gaming, I promised to post updates regarding my progress in the Contest of Insignificance. While only about 15 people read this (at best), I figured it is better to keep those people entertained than to just quit.

For those of you who are new, here is how it works: We pick 5 games/lines every week to bet against in the NFL. We keep score all season on how well we do against the Vegas spreads. Winner takes all. At $20 a head and a small amount of players, the title of the contest seems appropriate.

Before Week 8's games, I was in 2nd place and felt good about my selections. After Week 8, I was in 4th place and discouraged. Such as life in the world of a guy just looking for a break. It likely doesn't matter how I fare each week, but it's fun to pretend like I can catch Steve L. Read my last post to learn about the real contest and to see how the guy leading our $20 contest would be within spitting distance of the pedestal.

But, the beauty of the NFL is that each week brings new life. Here are my Week 9 picks and how I fared. I know it's Monday and there is still one game left, but I wanted nothing to do with the PIT/CIN game. Nothing in gambling...and likely nothing in viewing.

WEEK 9: 3-1-1 Record - moving me back into a tie for 3rd place.

Pretty solid bounce back week for me after falling under the 50% mark last week. Here is how it broke out...

1) NYG -6 @ SEA. WIN
I rarely feel amazing about my selections. If I were near a casino I would have dumped at least $50 on this line. There has been only 1 other line all season that I felt this good about and that was week 4 in which the Jets were favored by 5.5 at Buffalo. This is when Buffalo couldn't do anything and the Jets were pummeling teams. I said to my friend Steve F: "I would bet a house on this game." I wish I would have done the same with the Giants. They were up 28-0 before I even blinked and destroyed Seattle.

2) TB +8 @ ATL. WIN
Tampa, as I mentioned in my last post, looks strong this season after a pitiful 2009. Atlanta is good, but 8 points was just the right amount of cushion for me. It turned out to be almost the exact cushion Tampa gamblers needed as the Falcons won by 6. Note: Tampa had a shot to win the the game late, but failed to convert on a 4th and 1 play.

3) NYJ -4 @ DET. LOSS
Thanks Jets. Detroit is definitely improving as Stafford is looking like a true starting QB. I thought to myself "no way Rex Ryan (coach of the Jets) allows this team lose to DET this week. They are going to be pissed." The Jets were shut out at home a week earlier by the Packers (a game I was fortunate to be at). I was right, they didn't lose. But they also didn't win by enough - Jets by 3 on the first possession in Overtime.

4) IND +3 @ PHI. WIN
This was nothing but good ol' fashioned luck. This bet seemed too good to be true. Indy as an underdog against an Eagles team that is strong but starting a QB coming off of a rib inury? THROW THE HOUSE AT IT! Better to be lucky than good, right? A sketchy at best unnecessary roughness call on PHI defensive end Trent Cole kept a late Colts drive alive long enough for Peyton to punch in one more TD. See the highlight at about 2:25 here. Philly wins by 2 as they run out the clock. INDY gamblers everywhere rejoice!

5) BUF +3 vs. CHI (In Toronto). TIE
This game was one of those feel good picks that I couldn't avoid. Buffalo had lost two games in a row in OT by 3 points. Chicago was shaky going into their bye week and traveling to an indoor stadium in Canada. Buffalo was winning late in the 4th quarter and trying to put the game away when quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick threw an interception that led to the CHI game winning TD. Apparently 0-8 teams really do find ways to blow games, because Buffalo had an Extra Point blocked and Chicago hit a 2 pt conversion. It changed the entire outcome of the game for the gambling public. Chicago wins 22-19.

SEASON RECORD: 21-21-3

Talk about Even Steven.

The Whipped Cream and Cherry of Football

In a classic Simpsons episode, Homer describes gambling as a way to make something you love even better to his 8-year-old daughter. He uses the ol' "Sundae with whipped cream and cherries" analogy...which, as we all know, is a classic:

Homer: You like ice cream, don't you?
Lisa: Uh huh.
Homer: And don't you like ice cream better when it's covered with hot fudge?
And mounds of whipped cream? [getting carried away] And chopped nuts?
And, ooh, those crumbled-up cookie things they mash up?
Mmm... Crumbled-up cookie things...
Lisa concludes that ``gambling makes a good thing even better.''



I was tempted to use that exact analogy to discuss gambling and the NFL... It is spot on. However, I want to share a statement that sums up how I feel about the topic:

"you know my obsession with sports is a problem when i find ways to make lions @ bills exciting"

My esteemed colleague (and writer of A Shot in the Arm) said the above to me via one of our many IM conversations about football, and more specifically about gambling.

I would say that neither one of us is a gambling addict (except for him), but that each of us would agree 100% that it's an activity that can make pointless things...pointed.

With that, I bring to you The Hilton Supercontest: "Win BIG in the most respected, challenging and prestigious Pro football handicapping contest in the world!" This "contest" pits 300+ people against each other ($1,500/head) in a season-long battle of choosing 5 NFL lines every week. As a gambling addict, Steve had to have a taste. Unfortunately for him, he works in education and can't afford the entrance fee (to be fair neither can I). So, he did the next logical thing possible: Started a friendly $20 game amongst friends.

We have just completed week 7 of what I am deeming the Contest of Insignificance. Appropriately named based on the difference between our prize and the Supercontest Pot of Prizes - roughly $524,880 for those keeping score at home. This thing is driving me bonkers. I have much more money "invested" into Fantasy Football, yet for some reason I found myself recklessly yelling at the TV when Ben Rapelisburger fumbled the ball at the 1 yard line against the Dolphins on Sunday. With about 2:30 remaining in the game, Big Ben ran for the end zone and had the ball knocked loose 6 inches short of the goal line. Pittsburgh was granted the ball after some deliberation and they elected to kick a field goal to take a 1 point lead. Steeler fans rejoice! Their team is winning by 1 point! Meanwhile, I am vomiting in the corner. I NEEDED that Touchdown. A field goal does me no good. Beating Miami by 1 is as good as a loss to me when they are supposed to win by at least 3!
WTF!?!&&*&!

Minutes later, I found myself vested in the Tampa Bay-St. Louis game. This game featured TWO teams that combined for FOUR wins in 2009...teams that were supposed to be terrible in 2010 (they are average right now). This is not a recipe for a game of interest. However, with seconds left in the game, Tampa Bay scored a touchdown to go up by 1 point. I have them selected at -2.5 (meaning they have to win by at least 3 points), so my frustration continues. But wait! Hold the phone! Steve reminds me that the Buccaneers will go for the 2-point conversion instead of the extra point! They have a chance to go up by 3 points! Sadly, they fail (or I fail since Tampa still won the game...by 1 point).
WTF!?!&&*&!

This is what makes the Supercontest (and gambling in general) so great. I could have cared less about the Dolphins and Steelers or Buccaneers and Rams. But, each game was one of my 5 picks for the week. You have to find a way to make it exciting.

Check back for regular updates on my progress through this tumultuous NFL season. As we approach the halfway point, I am just below .500 with 16 wins, 17 losses and 2 ties. The good news is that my record is barely good enough for 2nd place in the Contest of Insignificance. The bad news is that Steve L (yes, a different Steve) is just crushing everyone right now (record: 21-12-2). In fact, that b@st@rd's record would put him in the running for the actual Supercontest in Vegas - the leader has 25 wins.

This just shows us that whoever is making these lines is good at it.

Here are my picks for Week 8:

DEN -even: I just don't see how SF can win without Alex Smith. My gut is crying for me to leave this game alone, but I don't believe in the Troy Smith era. I believe in Frank Gore, but also think it will be hard for SF to run with 14 guys in the box.

TB +3: This pick is solely on how disgusted I am by Arizona this year. Also, TB is showing improvement all the time and manages to keep games close.

PIT -even: New Orleans could easily show up for this game. They don't have a running game and Pittsburgh doesn't allow teams to run...so that's a wash. With Big Ben at the healm, I see enough Pitt O to overcome a potential 45 pass onslaught from Brees.

OAK -2.5: This may be the first game OAK has been favored in all year. I'm too lazy to check, but know that Seattle is about 1/2 the team on the road. Maybe they only bring 1/2 of their players?

DAL +6.5: I was really close to picking Miami+2 here. I may come to eat it. Jacksonville's defense can't stop anyone and I am hoping that gives Kitna the cushion he needs to cover up for his inevitable 2 INT game. The good news? Garrard is bad on the road and hasn't played since his concussion. I like the guy, not the situation.

UPDATE (11/2/10): I went 2-3 this week. That isn't going to cut it.

Dear Football...

Why do I love thee so? Why do I invest my heart and time into you? You don't love me back. You invest nothing into me. You just take...take...take. Oh, Football.

This last Sunday, Football, you crossed the line. For the second straight week you felt it necessary to send my Packers into overtime against a middle of the road team. And for the second straight week, you broke my heart. Three losses in four weeks? It is beginning to get very difficult to trust you, Football.

On top of giving a 3-3 start to the Packers, you have been destroying my favorite football team with injuries. Why would you send 4 starters to the depths of the Injured Reserve list in the first 5 weeks? What did Nick Barnett, Ryan Grant, Jermichael Finley and Morgan Burnett do to you? Why give Aaron Rodgers a concussion? Why tweak at Clay Matthews' hamstring? They have done nothing but give 100% of their life to you. Football, you are starting to piss me off.



As if ruining the Packers' season wasn't enough for you. You just had to take it one step further and start harassing my Fantasy Football teams. It wasn't bad enough that I have two teams at 2-4. You even decided to deliver injuries to BOTH of the starting WRs on my team with a 4-2 record: Malcom Floyd and DeSean Jackson. The latter of whom could be affected for the rest of his life. I invest so much love, time, and passion into you Football. When will I see some love in return? Football, I am angry.

Will I quit on you? No. Will I give up hope? No. I stuck with you through the tough 2005 and 2008 Green Bay seasons where you gave my beloved Packers a combined 8-22 record. I have stuck with you despite the curse you have placed on me in Fantasy Football and the subsequently difficult seasons I have experienced over the last few years. Truthfully, I can't see myself without you every Fall. Sure I can forget about you in Spring during March Madness and Summer when I am running about town. But Fall? Winter? I will always be with you.

Football, you have a chance to do something right! It's only Week 6. You don't have to torment me for the next 14 weeks. You can be better. You can give more to the Packers and take less. You can give breakout seasons to the NFL players on my Fantasy Football rosters. You can prevent the Packers from getting utterly destroyed at the new (DVD Rack) Meadowlands Stadium when 16 of my Packer-supporting friends join me to cheer for our team on Halloween afternoon. You can give me something back!

Dear Football,
I will always love you. But right now, you are really pissing me off.

UPDATE (10/26 - 10:48am): While the below photo was meant to show my anger at you Football, you showed signs of compassion on Sunday night. Feel free to continue that trend through the cold of winter!

Seriously Black Keys...Knock It Off

Ok Ok...I know. I have a total of 5 blog posts, so why use post #6 about a band I have already discussed in this space? Because in one word, they are AWESOME. I only say "Knock it Off," because I shouldn't be compelled to write about one subject so often. Yet here we are.

Since my original review of Brothers from its release week, I have been spinning the disc regularly (and by "spin the disc" I clearly mean "push the digital play button"). You will be happy to know that the disc is still great and I don't feel compelled to stop listening any time soon.

Recently, my esteemed colleague (with a gambling problem), had posted a link accompanied by a selection of ambiguous text: "Pretty sure I never get sick of this song (or the video)." Like I do with most of his links (despite the lack of detail around them), I clicked.

What I was treated to was the official Black Keys' video for the album's single Tighten Up. At this point you have to realize that it is worth watching; simply due to the fact that I have written an entire post about it. With a band like the Black Keys, you don't expect them to come out with amazing videos. To be frank, they don't need to. I already discussed the song's (and album's) qualities here, but they absolutely hit the mark. This video just rules. I will let you watch NOW...feel free to come back to read my highlights when you are done with your music video homework.

The Black Keys - Tighten Up - Official Video from Chris Marrs Piliero on Vimeo.

The Highlights:

1) I love, love, love watching kids lip synch adult songs. The kid with the glasses absolutely ruled at it with my favorite part at about 2:12
2) The kid with the glasses (aka tiny Patrick Carney) reminds me a TON of this famous Sports movie character:

3) Simply put, the reaction of Dan Auerbach at 2:18 as his kid punches Carney's kid.
4) Then, as Auerbach and Carney attempt to break up the fight (finally), who doesn't love watching a group of kids beat on some adults. Awesome.
5) Auerbach absolutely just tosses a kid on the ground at 2:59 as he begins to gawk at the babe.

It's a side I love to see from the Black Keys. You know they aren't taking themselves too seriously, but are seriously good at what they do. A comedic, light-hearted music video doesn't seem like an avenue they would have explored, but I am certainly glad that they did. If you haven't gotten acquainted yet with Brothers, give it a try. However, in the words of the great Bob Slydell, "I celebrate this [band's] entire catalog," so you should give any of their discs a whirl. And if you haven't gotten into one of my favorite bands at this point, I will be forced to (yet again) try to convince you in the next 5-7 posts.

New Buzz Word Has Been Around For Centuries

Over the course of the past 3-5 years, our society has taken an interesting turn. (Maybe I should say American society - because I have not been elsewhere to experience it, but my gut tells me that Europe, Asia, Australia are in on the fun.) The younger half of the world has become obsessed with the need to tell everyone where they are, what they are doing, what they are feeling, and whether or not they should have "eaten that burrito for lunch."

With tweets, status updates, foursquare, myspace-ing (yes, it still exists), checking in, and an upcoming movie, it is safe to say that "social currency" is more than a buzz word, but a way of life.

I personally LOVE the term social currency. What better way to define one's popularity or interest to the world? It just rolls off the tongue...social...currency. Within the world of media/marketing, social currency is a buzz word - one that major brands are after on a daily basis. In fact, advertising agencies and marketers have invested millions of dollars into enhancing their product or brand's SOCIAL CURRENCY. Man, it just sounds cool doesn't it? Social is Fun. Currency is Money. FUN MONEY!?

While the term is relatively new, there is already a trademarked company and a Wikipedia definition:

"a common term that can be understood as the entirety of actual and potential resources which arise from the presence in social networks and communities, may they be digital or offline. It derives from Pierre Bourdieu’s social capital theory and is about increasing one’s sense of community, granting access to information and knowledge, helping to form one’s identity, and providing status and recognition."

Yet, the concept of social currency has been around for centuries. If you read further into the Wikipedia definition (no matter how poorly written it is), the site notes that social currency is "information shared which encourages further social encounters. It can be a factor in establishing fans of sports or television programs...However these types of fans can easily move to a new sport, team, or program in the future if the new one offers more social currency."

Does anyone see a difference between this and the lunch room in middle school? You are popular one week, and not the next. If you offer something to the group, the group will accept you, but if another offering is better, the group moves on. In fact, the band-wagon fans of the world should be 100% familiar with this concept (cough-Vikings-cough-LA teams-cough). Provide something to rally around, and we will remain loyal. It's a simple concept.

This is why marketers, media companies, and ad agencies are tripping over themselves to enhance the social currency of their brand EVERY day. Some companies are doing a great job of delivering value to their social followings (fans/followers/whatever). One example in New York City/New Jersey is The Lite Choice. This company offers all Twitter followers a special coupon code EVERY DAY for a discount/deal at their frozen yogurt shops. Every time I am remotely interested in the thought of FroYo (in fact this post is driving up said interest), I check the TLC deal of the day. As a fan or follower, I can then make it "Social" be re-sharing with my friends. Done. Simple.

On the flip side, some companies are struggling mightily with this concept. I cannot reveal the company name, but I had one person that works for a Fortune 100 company in the media/marketing industry tell me something close to the following:

"Great. I have 500 fans. What does that even mean for my company, my brand? What are we supposed to be doing with those fans? Am I supposed to invest resources towards this fan page?"

I was appalled. If a marketer needs to ask what to do with 500 people that have RAISED THEIR HANDS as fans of a brand/product/service, then someone is clearly missing the boat on social currency. It should be pretty obvious, pretty low-cost re-marketing. In fact, that someone should be demoted or maybe moved to a project that doesn't involve the big, scary internet.



Here we stand. We have a fancy buzz word, a society hell bent on telling people what they ate for breakfast, and a slew of marketers trying to solve the social currency question. I am excited by what social currency means to the world of media/marketers and the benefits it is bringing to consumers - aka frozen yogurt discounts. However, I know for a fact that there are people out there with "social marketing" in their job title. I have met them. Isn't it funny that a concept that originated around the lunch room, something understood by band wagon fans all across America, has spawned a slew of careers and job titles? It's time that social marketing and/or currency is not seen as a separate function with unnecessary job titles. It is marketing.

New Band Drives Me to Stalker Status

Go ahead. Ask me to stop. Demand that I "Knock it Off!" Forcefully pull my headphones from my ears or mute my amazing laptop speakers. For the last 5-6 days I have been listening to the first full length album of Brooklyn-based, piano-driven, rock/pop band Wakey!Wakey! ... and I simply cannot stop. Of the last four mornings, I have woken up with the chorus to 1876 - The Brooklyn Theatre Fire jammed into my head during three of them. Insert irony #1: I have a band called Wakey!Wakey! stuck in my head in the morning.

Based on a co-workers' recommendation (insert shout out to Laurie Ortiz), I verbally committed to check out their concert last Friday at a hybrid concert venue/bowling alley: Brooklyn Bowl. As we all know, a verbal commitment to a $5 show in a different part of town is worth...well...about five bucks. However, after spinning a few tracks the days leading up to the show (and a planned trip to the Brooklyn Brewery beforehand), I was truly excited to check out Wakey!Wakey! on their home turf. In the end, they delivered a 4-star show and I couldn't be more thrilled with my first concert experience in New York City/first trip to Brooklyn.

The truly ironic thing is that Modest Mouse was playing an outdoor concert just down the road from the Brooklyn Bowl on the East River front. I have wanted to see Modest Mouse for about 2 years and an outdoor concert with the Manhattan skyline as the back drop would have been a must-buy ticket for me. In fact, some of the people we met at the Brooklyn Brewery were heading in that direction. Insert irony #2: The first I heard of the Modest Mouse concert was about an hour before it was scheduled to start. Had I heard about it a month before, I would have been a ticket holder. Instead, Modest Mouse was sold out and my $5 verbal commitment was taking me to the Brooklyn Bowl. I was tickled with jealousy toward the guys heading to the river front.

God smiled upon me that evening friends...

After only 4 songs, the Modest Mouse concert was canceled due to significant lightning activity and an incoming thunderstorm. Cut to view of me at that point: Standing in a nifty bar...dry, comfortable, waiting through a below-average opening band, holding a fresh Bengali Tiger IPA. Not too shabby at all.

You could say God smiled upon Wakey!Wakey! that night as well. In fact, lead man Mike Grubbs was eloquent enough to recognize that fact: He literally thanked God and welcomed dozens of Modest Mouse fans (mostly identified by the wearing of a backpack) that had rolled into the venue looking for some drinks and live music. They received exactly what they were looking for (unless they thought $6 for a craft tap beer was too pricey...it most certainly is not).

Wakey!Wakey! delivered a delicious set and even treated the crowd to what they called an "unplanned" encore (I know what you are thinking, but I am 70% sure it was unplanned). After the show, I had the chance to chat with Mike and his new drummer (with the band 2 weeks, could have fooled me). It was all over their faces...they just had a really good time. It is an absolute pleasure to see a newer band truly enjoy a live show, displaying an aura of excitement after just killing a set.



Since that night, I have been rocking their debut disc Almost everything I wish I'd said the last time I saw you... And rocking it at an unhealthy frequency. Feel free to join me by streaming it online: Wakey!Wakey! Site

This is the section of the post where I could start breaking down the elements of the songs and giving reviews on specific pieces/moments of the album. I won't subject you to any over-explained details, leaving you only with that chorus that I woke up with in my head this morning:
"I don't wanna let you down, I don't wanna let you down...just when fire could take this town."

Sign up for the Wakey!Wakey! email list and get a free download HERE

Brothers without Sisters - The Black Keys

It's about that time. For the third post in my catalog I am going to make the move from Sports to Music. Over the course of history, this is a move that many have attempted. Some successful. Most not. I really hope to do this gracefully and avoid another Ron Artest moment in music. With that, a review of the new Black Keys album.

Just like their throw-back sound, The Black Keys have been churning out albums in throw-back style. With the upcoming release of Brothers in mid-May, the Akron blues duo will have 6 studio efforts in almost exactly 8 years. I wouldn't call myself an original fan of this rapidly-growing band, nor would I call myself a band wagon jumper. I will say emphatically that I grabbed onto these guys for dear life after hearing a few tracks off of their disc Magic Potion in late 2006. You can bet your sweet hiney that I am not letting go, either.

I originally corralled the advance release of the single "Tighten Up" courtesy of my go-to for much of my new music leads: Eric Hansen. Then, just last week found myself access to the upcoming release of Brothers. There really is nothing like getting your hands on a disc that you're really excited about before you are supposed to. I equate the feeling with flying up to the North Pole and hijacking Santa's workshop for presents the week before Christmas. I can't decide if it's more like a ninja attack, or just flying into Santa's crib with guns-a-blazing. I will leave that up to your imagination.

"Tighten Up" was the obvious choice on this disc for the single. It grabs you. The tune starts with a little whistling line that has serious "get stuck in your head" potential. Dan Auerbach's vocals are exactly what you want on this song and Patrick Carney shows off his unusual drum rhythms that truly drive a song. I have heard similar types of beats from Carney in the past and just can't get enough (i.e. "Back Door" and "Just Got To Be" from the aforementioned Magic Potion, or "Have Mercy on Me" from their EP Chulahoma). My favorite part of "Tighten Up" is the switch at around 2 and a half minutes. You think it could be ending and sadness begins to set in, but then sure enough, JOY!!! The song goes on and just gets funkier. LOOK OUT FOR THAT FUNK, KID!

When I first had the chance to listen to Brothers in its entirety, I listened to it out of order (The shuffle feature is both a blessing and a curse and could be a blog post on its own). I feel as though I should slap myself in the face for this music fan miscue. Bands invest buckets of time into selecting the order of their art and I disgraced it. Shame on me. It could even be the reason why I was underwhelmed after my first listen of the disc. However, I have given it a good 5-6 spins now and am completely digging it. Dan and Patrick have really found ways to keep their sound dirty as shit, yet refined and unique. When I first listened to these guys, I would introduce their music to friends as "Dirty Garage-Blues. Leave the Girls at Home." Now, when I listen to songs like "Sinister Kid" and "Next Girl," I still hear those dirty undertones that I love, that I need. Yet they definitely have placed a different twist on their music since they created Attack & Release, something the Keys can call their own. From the opening track "Everlasting Light" to the closing track "Unknown Brothers," the Black Keys deliver exactly that: Dirty, Yet Refined Garage Blues (patent-pending).

If I had to place a bet on the maturation of their sound, I would gamble big on their work with Danger Mouse for the Attack & Release album in 2008. Danger Mouse makes an appearance in the production credits on the new disc for the single "Tighten Up," but his influence has clearly been strong on the boys from Akron. I would not have been the least bit surprised if his name were tied to every track of Brothers. While his influence on the band is definitely good, I would be lying if I told you that I never yearned for a little less production and a little more of that original Black Keys' raw sound. If you are like me and love that side of the band, feel free to quiet that addiction at your local The Black Keys concert, coming this summer.

If you buy music (whichever format) and like rock, get onboard with Brothers. There really isn't a reason not to. We need to support bands like the Black Keys in an era of unoriginal rock and American Idols. These guys deliver what we want and what we deserve and I thank them for that. I raise my glass and say "Here's to growing and being unique...but...if you ditch that dirty-as-shit-garage-blues sound, so help me god I will freak out." Although, after seeing them live a few times, I am confident that a freak out will be unnecessary.



Highlights --
- The Jack White "Aggravated Assault" Tracks (that grab you right away): Tighten Up, Everlasting Light

- The Al Green "Feel Good" Track (that slows it down): Unknown Brother

- The Grammy Award Speech One-Liner: "That's me...the boy with the broken halo"


Dedicated to Loris and GK for helping me find the Black Keys

Dip, Duck, Dodge, Retire

Most people lose sleep over popular topics such as relationships, jobs, family and health issues. Here I sit, dead tired at 5:23pm on a Monday because I lost sleep last night. Over which of those topics you ask? RJ, is everything ok? Yes. It is. I lost sleep over dodgeball.

For the last 2 years I have played 3 seasons of dodgeball in the West LA Dodgeball League as co-captain of "White Goodman's Package." I will get to the team name later. Last night marked the culmination of my West LA Dodgeball career as we lost in the championship game to our rival: Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner. Before we get to the lost hours of sleep, let's take it back to the beginning.

It all began with my friend Trina (don't worry, none of us can pronounce it). She mentioned that one of her friends heard about an adult dodgeball league. "It would be a fun way to get together on week nights." She proceeded to invite me to be "co-captain" because:
a) I know a lot of people
b) I am "good at organizing things"

Thanks for the homework Trina.

Despite my distaste for homework, I obliged. Tell me which part of the following does not sounds fun: Whipping spongy balls at random people with 19 of your friends. Yes, the game features teams of 20 and is played on a basketball half court. Yes, it's crowded. Yes, it's madness for the first few minutes.

Trina and I proceeded to round up a group of people that included friends, friends-of-friends, and co-workers. Then, the next challenge: what to name our team. All of the obvious signs pointed to naming the team after balls (which would follow juvenile giggling). Some other team names are Blue Balls, Naughty Balls, and Kenny Dodgers (I like that one). However, I decided that we had to name our team after the most ridiculous figure in dodgeball lore: White Goodman...and his package. White Goodman is Ben Stiller's character in Dodgeball: An Underdog Story. His package, is cartoon-esque. We then themed our colors and logo after UPS (get it? packages?) to really capture the essence of delivering packages - aka spongy balls at the other team.

When we showed up for our first game, we had no idea what was in store. People in short shorts, costumes, mustaches, tank tops. It was like an 80's party on a Tuesday without a bartender. Which was odd to me, being from the Midwest. We played our first exhibition match against a team of ragweeds that honestly looked like a group of drop-out teenagers from high school. Two of them had jeans on, one guy that we came to call "beard" had a big temper and a scraggy beard (shocker), and about half of them had those chain belts attached to their wallets. Apparently they were worried about being pick pocketed during a dodgeball game. I studied the game closely over the next few seasons and saw no pick-pocketing. This group of the most uncoordinated looking castoffs absolutely destroyed the WGP debut, beating us 7-0.

The funny thing about that first night was that it completely proved dodgeball as a legitimate sport that requires:
- Strategy
- Teamwork
- Athleticism
- Agility
If that band of alternative teenage wannabe's could play this game, we certainly could. WGP adapted to the game quickly and went on to win back-to-back championships over the next two seasons. The first trophy (The Golden Hen) was claimed after absolutely blowing out that very same band of misfits that destroyed us before we understood what the hell was going on. We won 8-1 and they tried to pick a fight in the parking lot while smoking cigarettes next to an open car trunk. Damn 30-year-old teenagers. The second trophy (The Golden Parakeet) was rounded up after taking down our soon-to-be rivals: Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner.

This bring us to my lost sleep. Season 3 came to a close last night after losing the championship game - a match that was played at The Staples Center (yes, the very same one as the Clippers and Lakers). As a 3-time team captain (with Trina and then THE Dan Frazier), I have played my last game with WGP. I am moving to New York City in 2 months and have come to the realization that dodgeball had became a great part of my weekly life. I certainly never would've done anything on a NBA court in my life, let alone play a fun sport, if it wasn't for dodgeball and WGP. Dodgeball had a funny way of bringing out that competitive spirit that we all loved from our youth. Plus, I was on the court after a Clippers game! That is cool even if the Clippers lost by almost 30 to the Mavericks.

After seasons 1 and 2, I thought I wouldn't play another season. Even during this season I said to Frazier, "This is gonna be my last season." Yet, as I laid in my bed last night, all I could do was think about our loss in the championship game:
"How could we have played differently?"
"Where did we screw up?"
"Why didn't I chose the better side to start?"
"How did I not catch that ball in the 4th game?"

If I lost a few hours of sleep over an adult dodgeball game, I can only begin to imagine what starting pitchers go through after losing a playoff game, or what a College Basketball player goes through after missing a game-winning shot, or what Troy Williamson goes through every day.



At the end of the day, I certainly feel like I am retiring from LA Dodgeball on top. WGP won 2 golds and a silver during my tenure as team captain and we hosted a couple of solid league-wide parties. I leave the team in good hands and am looking forward to hearing about how the team rages on. Like all crusty athletes, I now am stricken to the stands, sipping my beer, eating my nachos, and yelling at my team whenever they F-it up. The joys of being a fan. Hopefully, now I will get some sleep.

Holiday in March

Some of my coworkers may have heard this last week as I strolled into my office on the 3rd floor of Building A in the Yahoo! Center in Santa Monica:

"Merry Christmas Everyone! Best Day of the Year!"

Hopefully they weren't offended. It was pretty early for my office.

Most people would probably disagree with me when I say that the first day of the NCAA Basketball Tournament is the best day of the year. That is quite a statement...probably an overstatement. But what the hell, I am an emotional guy who gets riled up easily. You can try to debate the statement, you can squash my positivity, or you can just not be an A-Hole and bask in the warm, warming glow of March Madness.

Like all holiday seasons, March Madness' first day is merely part of the holiday. Like some sort of awesome hybrid between Christmas and Chanukah, it spills into multiple days of glory and presents. Most importantly, like all holidays, the NCAA Tournament has its high points and low points. The 2010 First and Second rounds were no exception. Let me take you through a few of mine.

High Point: Walking into a place of work full of TVs and the DirecTV March Madness On-Demand program on the first day of the NCAA Tournament. I really do enjoy my job.

Low Point: Receiving a phone call in the afternoon on Friday, March 19th from a co-worker in Atlanta who could care less about the NCAA Basketball Tournament and needs me to brainstorm ideas with her. At this point, all my ideas are oddly around Happy Hour and basketball. She apparently doesn't know that Michigan State and New Mexico State are playing now.

High Point: Living vicariously through a group of my friends (all University of Minnesota Alumni) that have taken Friday off of work to go to Milwaukee, WI to support the Gophers in their second straight NCAA Tournament appearance. I receive the following text from my collegiate roommate at 8:23am on Friday, March 20th: "Tickets secured. T-minus 1 hr until tipoff. Sh** talking to Xavier fans has already started."

Low Point: 3 hours and 5 minutes later I receive the following text from another college buddy who made the trek to Milwaukee: "Ugghh...I don't know which game was worse, this or iowa state in 05." Our alumni had fallen to Xavier 65-54 as the Muskateers simply outplayed the Gophers in the 2nd half. We are humbly returned to the "better luck next year" phrase.

High Point: I receive a text from my equally sports-obsessed friend on Saturday, March 20th at 4:45 pm PST: "Get to a tv dude. KU down 1 w/ 42 seconds left."

This represents the "madness." Northern Iowa has a VERY late lead against Kansas and could send the tournament's overall #1 seed home to Lawrence, which would effectively destroy almost half of America's brackets. Roughly 45% of all people playing some type of Tournament Bracket game said that Kansas would win the National Championship. All of those people, including myself, and my previously mentioned friend, were wrong. I listened to the text on my cell phone, found a TV, and watched as the #9 seeded Panthers ousted the mighty Jayhawks. While my bracket was destroyed and my pride (Def: pride) was sent down the drain, this was a great moment.

Low Point: I send a text to the same friend on Sunday, March 21st at 4:19 pm PST: "F***in CBS! Xavier/Pitt is 3 pts with 20 seconds left and they won't leave Cal/Duke (20 point game)."

This represents the wrong type of "madness." To me this is exactly what it felt like to be a kid and get a crappy sweater from your grandma or aunt. This is just ridiculous. No kid wants a sweater. No College Basketball viewer wants to watch Duke hold Cal over the coals in a 20 point massacre. Not even Cal fans. Granted, I realize I live in California and that Cal is a California school. Pretty obvious. Just to be sure, I polled three of my coworkers that are Cal grads on the following Monday: they verified that, yes, they wished the other game(s) were featured. Keep in mind the Texas A&M-Purdue game was tied and went into Overtime. But yeah, let's keep showing the Duke-Cal blowout. Genius.

Sure, I could have opened my laptop and used CBS' March Madness On-demand product to watch the end of both of the other games online. In fact, I did just that. However, I think 99% of people would agree that it is much more fun to watch the close games in HD on a 47" Flat Screen and render the blowout games to the 15" screen in LD (Def: Low-Definition) Stupid CBS.

High or Low Point (depending on how you view it): Early on Sunday afternoon I am catching up with my favorite aunt that lives in Chicago. She is a sports fan, but could care less about the NCAA Tournament (she likes the Chicago Bears - yuck). In the middle of talking to her, #5 Michigan State and #4 Maryland (aka the Greivis Vasquezes) decide to absolutely slug it out for the last couple minutes of their epic Second Round game. As if I wasn't distracted enough already, Michigan State's backup point guard Korie Lucious hits a buzzer-beating 3 pointer (0:51 seconds in here) to render me speechless with my favorite aunt. So, depending on your point of view, this could be a High or Low point of this epic "holiday" season. Is it an amazing moment that encapsulates all that is the NCAA Tournament? Or am I just a crappy nephew? I think we know where I stand.

Whether you celebrate Christmas, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, or nothing, if you are a sports fan, you love the first day and the first weekend of the NCAA Tournament. If you don't love it, you frickin' should. Oh the highs! Oh those lows! There is a river of emotion and pride involved (Def: pride) both on the court and with the fans that try to predict every David vs. Goliath upset. It's one of the only venues in sports where the small guys even get a chance to take down the big guys. Even if you are anti-collegiate athletics (cough-mydad-cough). Even if you believe that they shouldn't be "training grounds for professional athletes." You need to watch one game (exception: #1 v. #16 games) and tell me that these teams are not trying as hard as they can. Tell me they don't want it. I can't think of one time in sports where you see more players cry or show such raw enthusiasm. This is all bottled up over four great days. And just like Christmas, only a week later we get another holiday: Four more nights that we know as the Sweet 16 and Elite 8. Happy New Year...in March.